Emotional Overload
Emotional Overload . . . Recognize the symptoms
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
Of the 800 times the word ‘heart’ is used in the Old Testament, more than 200 of those times it directly refers to one’s thought, life, or emotions. Those things at the very core of one’s being, the things that motivate us and keep us motivated.
Emotional exhaustion can arise when a person experiences a period of excessive stress, in one or more area of their life, which leaves them feeling entirely overwhelmed. They may feel that they have lost control and that things are escalating faster than they can keep up.
ANYONE can experience extreme emotional fatigue, especially when they have experienced a sudden, traumatic change in their lives. (Haven’t we all?) The most dangerous thing for any of us to say is that “It cannot happen to me.” Since my own emotional illness in the late 1980s, I have counselled a huge number of well respected, resolute leaders who made that foolish statement only to deeply regret it.
As spiritual leaders, we like to leave the impression that we are firmly in control of our emotional wellbeing and that our defenses are impregnable. We need to remind ourselves that God sees our frailty and remembers that we are dust. Can we accept the same self-evaluation and be okay with it?
Unheeded, emotional exhaustion will have significant impact on a person’s daily life, relationships and behaviour. It will eventually lead to some level of burnout.
In this short blog I would like to point out early warning signs of emotional exhaustion, the people who are most susceptible, and offer a few helpful tips.
If you are feeling any of the following things on a repeating basis, it’s time to reach out to a trusted source for some support.
Changing Mood: Uncharacteristic pessimism or cynicism, increased irritability, increasing apathy, a feeling of doom or hopelessness, a feeling that you are failing, a sense that you are not measuring up by comparison to others.
Compromised Concentration: Confusion, frustration, loss of creativity, memory lapses.
Sleeping Changes: Difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep, deep weariness despite sleep.
Body Changes: Appetite changes, digestive issues, headaches without a defined source, heart arrhythmias, panic attacks, sweating spells not related to exercise.
Who is most susceptible?
Those who have suddenly had the demands of their job increase and feel that things are spinning out of control.
Those who are perfectionistic in personality tend to place unrealistic expectations on their performance and are self-deprecating about outcomes of their efforts.
Those who find themselves lonely. Spiritual leaders, for the most part, feed on human interaction and relationships. When circumstances mitigate against that possibility (distancing), there is a greater risk of emotional overload.
Those who are at the forefront of compassion related ministry.
Those who are undisciplined in diet, exercise and rest.
Some quick tips to help a you bounce back:
Monitor your diet, eat plenty of fruits and green vegetables, whole grains and protein.
Limit your caffeine intake.
Walk – It is proven that walking stimulates the manufacturing and release of serotonin and dopamine in the brain – both essential to mental health.
Aim for 7 – 9 hours of sleep each night. Your work will still be there tomorrow.
Develop, without guilt, a hobby unrelated to your work.
Spend time in the Presence of God each morning stilling your spirit. Your work will wait.
Connect – Use whatever means you have to relate to others. Do not cocoon or hibernate. This only intensifies the issue.
Change your attitude:
(From a list found in the Medical News Today)
Focus on what is going right rather than what is going wrong
Replace negative thoughts with positive, realistic ones
Avoid COMPARISON with others
Accept that sometimes negative feelings occur. It is normal human behaviour
Stay in the present rather than focusing on the past or trying to invent the future
Talk to a therapist
The above ideas may seem elementary, but experience has taught me that many spiritual leaders do not practise these safeguards. The statistics speak for themselves.
Please feel free to contact al@abnwt.com and I would be happy to chat with you. We care about your physical and emotional wellbeing. It’s okay not to be okay!
Al is an experienced pastor and counselor who works out of our ABNWT District Resource Centre in Edmonton as the Pastoral Care Coordinator. A pastor to the pastors, Al is a friend, mentor, and confidante to all.